Pathogenic Infection

Posted on May 11, 2004

Argh!

Hi BeetleJuice,

A pathogenic agent was found in your food. The pathogen lives in your digestive tract and affects your metabolism: every hour 10% of the food is digested but it will increase your energy level by just 5%. Your excrement will be contaminated.

It all started a couple of days ago when Simon said:

I have a spare egg.

Which was a puzzle, as I’d not really heard of Breedster. The explanation from Simon was pretty straightforward:

It’s the Mornington Crescent of social networking sites.

So I accepted the gracious offer of one of his offspring and signed up. Everything seemed to be going well - I transformed into the larval stage and then emerged as a beautiful ASCII rendered bug. Right next to me was Wendy and she seemed to have been around a bit (six days old!), so I pressed all of the right buttons and we were rewarded with two beautiful eggs of our own. Sharing of offspring seems very well defined in the Breedster world and the spoils of our communion were split evenly, with one egg each to pass on to other aspiring breeders.

Then this morning, the deadful news repeated above. What to do? Presumably it’s something I ate, but all of the blue stuff looks the same - how is a bug supposed to tell the difference? Maybe it will wear off in a few days…

Update: In order to meet a promise to cavey79, I sashayed up along side Courtney. She seemed nice in an ASCII me no questions, I tell you no lies kind of way, but things didn’t turn out the way I’d hoped:

You have 1 egg(s). A sexually transmitted virus has affected your reproductive system; all eggs are infertile. You cannot invite any friends.

Fornication will transmit the virus to your partner.